i luv u, u love me, we r a happy family. :D

Sunday, 18 September 2011


Before Hamza bin laden, breaks into my house and kills me,
I know i kinda freaked u out, since last night,
and u know what?
I was just playing with ur emotions,
and it was:
YEAH!!1 Just for the sake of sun :P
I know, next time we meet, u r gonna kick my balls hard, and then rip me apart,
and i won't complain about it,
cos i know i got u into a real trouble,
yeah, am so sorry, i won't do that again,
well, i would do that again, it was fun :P
So fun se yad aya:
Yeah bloggers meetup. 
You just can't imagine how much fun we had,
yeah, seriously u can't,
cos for that u should become
and in 
Moonie's style, 
Yeah, (nod ur head twice, if u wanna be assum)
Did, u read the title of this post?
yeah, we r DOUGHNUT HEROES, why?
WELL, its a long story, 
but the conclusion is cos we r awesome, that is why we r heroes
there is only one difference between us and them, they rescue people AND we get people into danger. :D

our, League of doughnut heroes.
and why that doughnut comes in the middle,
It's cos we all had a doughnut before the party began, 
and Asif, jaldi se doughnut khao, 
its like our energy pack.
Man!!!!! assum, aren't we. :P
and u know what,
I was out of my home since, 7:00 am in the morning and got back at around 10:30 pm,
and it took me almost 2 hours to get back to home, because of :
  1. Traffic on the roads of kaachi
  2. and, i live outside the city, Gulshan-e-maymar.
and when i got home and asked my mom for the food, she was like:
U were out the whole day, and at 11 pm u return and then ask me for food!!!!!

and u know the worst thing, i wasted almost 1000 bucks in a day, 
and still mouses were playing football in my stomach, (hunger)
Hey, what bakwas (crap) is am taking about,
Hey, did i introduce u the members of my team,
so here is my team:
Furee kat 

Hamza bin laden 
Russian bear 
Asif Iqbal 
of course:
ME. :D

and do u know what song like fits our  meetup?
i know it is annoying, but i love it,
Wait wait wait,
Annoying se yad aya:
Public toilets,
and u know what?
today i went into a public toilet in a mall,
ad there it was written:
"yahan akey to sab ki nikal jati he":P
translation for gori chamri:
"even macho man ends up peeing here". 
i was like,
WTF, and i laughed real hard on that one,
people thought i was crazy,
i would accept that,
cos the odor there makes u CARAZY,
that is so yukkkyyyy,
and u know what i do, i hide my face till my nose in my shirt,
That makes me feel better,
and what is more,
on one public toilet in Sindbad (an amusement park) it was written:
"This way to the ministry of magic".

Lol, i get easily distracted, so i was takin about meetup,
Yeah it was great,
i am so happy that i really went there,
the best part,
we sat in a resturant for almost 45 minutes and yet we were too busy talking that we didn't order anything,
than not to leave an impact, that we were some perverts we had a drink/ice cream before we left,
And one more thing,
I was like posting a description of every one below the pictures, but 
as it is like impossible for us to store the whole oceans of world into tiny bucket it is impossible to describe these extraordinary people in few words, lines or sentences,
They like are in comparable, and indescribable 
ahh, that was so great meeting them,
Wait, wait wait. :P
Great se yad aya:
women driving.
The only reason why u should look in both ways while crossing a one way road. 

i don't know who the hell gave these women  permission to drive,
when women drive, it is a fact that u would:
Jao gay car mein, or aao gay akhbar mein,
go in a car and return in newspaper
and the fact is, 
all the women of the world drive car in the same way,
back stiffed, eyes on the bonnet rather than on the road,
moreover, rather than using their side mirrors and rear mirror, they turn 360 degrees while turning or parking,
and when something happens to car, they won't dare to call someone or even mechanic, they would lock the car, hire a taxi and return home,
like my mom once did,
that's how it ends,

Monday, 12 September 2011

Blah Blah Blah. (part 5)

 DO U know what is the cause of variation in love between a husband and women,
The number of children they destroy together.
Man, u get things more clearly than those clean jokes. :P
Yeah so people,
on the floor, come and get some more,
yeah i have lost my brain,
NOTE: brain, yah the one in my skull,
not BRAINS. :P
till now i dodn't knew i have a brain,
hahahahah, but i knew i had brains,
i use them more than my brain,
OK, now my lame thing starts,
and ends,
and i push it in a KHADDA,
and then i slipped and into the khadda, and and and
woke up from sleep,
see, i told ya, i have lost something i never had (brain)

SO what happened?
the common question,
ya i am smart,
SMART se yad aya:
(from smart i remembered)
Have u ever thought, that would have happened if calculators were built with an ability to calculate smartness?
Yeah that would have been awesome for you,
no not for me,
COS, it would have shown the  "limit reached" sign, for my smartness.
ssssssss, ARROGANT. :D 

MAN!!!! back to the story of what happened,
yeah, today morning, i was like in the bathroom, washing my face, yah i do watch this ugly pumpkin daily,
and its like my hobby to wash my face with eyes open and i as usual applied the soap to my face, and started rubbing it,
NOTE: today is monday, and as usual on monday mornings i am in illusions, delusions and dilemmas,
So my mind was somewhere i don't know and i was rubbing my cheeks, all of a sudden the soap went into my both eyes,a nd i was like
I turned around don't know why, and as my luck hates me,
i banged my head into edge of the door, which was half open,
and i fell on the ground, hitting my hip and now i am
HIP-less too.
and it was so bad, i just can't tell you,
my ass hurts every time i sit.
spanked, :(
and have u heard this quote:
"a bad start makes the whole day a bad one".
No, u haven't
me neither,
but if you do hear it,
well u won't cos its not correct even, cos my day was good today,
cos i figured out, even i had a brain.
 the result of not paying for things, muftey mein itna hi milta he :P
OH man!!!!
OMG, i fogot but how,
lol, glad i remembered it at the right time,
this is what happened with my friend few days back when he was in a restaurant:
He said,
"I was sitting on my chair, enjoying my meal, suddenly i felt fart coming in, it was so urgent that i didn't had time to stand and go to washroom,
i had an idea, the music was loud, and every one was busy with their meal,
i timed my fart with the beats of the music,
when i was done, i looked around as a victorious guy but instead everyone was staring at me,
i was like What happened,
this was when i remembered that i had earphones plugged in my ear,
Hahahahhahahaha, horrible but funny,  

hahaha, that was epic wasn't it,
and the truth here,
did u laugh on it,
Now don't smile and think that u acted smart to laugh on it,
and u know what,
the person facing diarrhea can't laugh out loud or sneeze,
cus if he would put exert pressure, he would dirty his pants. :P
Hope u weren't facing diarrhea while reading this,
i don't want u to curse me, while washing your pants :P
Man, that would be enough for today,
i just had great time writing this one,
and hey hey hey hey
so what's the next plan for blogger meet-up,
Barish ne is waley plan pe toh pani pheir dia,
kisi k pas koi plan, mail me up, i wanna badly meet u people.
and one more things,
1 more week and then EXAMS,
and u know what
its the first time in my life, that i am waiting badly for exams:
no,!!! its just i am studying these days, yeah :D

Ok, before my mom gets into the room and throws my laptop in the dustbin,
Good bye folks,
hope u had a fun read,
and if not,
Lol u r fucked,
that woyld be the:
its not near, it is THE END.

Tuesday, 6 September 2011

Blah Blah Blah. (part 4)

a single comma can save a man's life.
So please avoid these small errors for the sake of lives of people living near you.
Always check what you write,
lol, look who is sayin that,
The guy who just wrote sayin, and is too lazy to write saying.
So, peoplez how are you,
no don't answer that in comments, i ain't that courteous, it was just a formality, neither am your doc.
Crazy, isn't it,
who asked u :P
So do u know, u can create an atom bomb yourself,
yes u can,
u know how,
all u will need is to fart consistently for  6 years and 9 months.
I am serious,
search it yourself.

it should have been like this:
life isn't about finding yourself an atomic bomb, its about creating one yourself for yourself.
"Sab choro bomb phoro".
angrez ki nasal:
"leave everything, do bombing". :P
Oye, wait don't start now, u r in a region where:
Cos ,
Hey i said no farting, asshole!!!!!!
Don't tell me what u have eaten in breakfast, lunch or dinner,
i am really not interested in what u ate.
Farting se yad aya
i remembered this from farting:
Once, i went to a shop, which was filled with all crazy stuff,
and there i saw a bag, which produced the 'fart' sound, when pressed.
So all u had to do was to place it on chair and make anyone sit on it, and then:

simply: barhhrhrhrhrhrh
Ok that was a bit:
Ok!! not a bit but it was totally lame.
So people, tighten your belts (of pants)
u lost the game,
i never said
Simon says :P

Oh yeah, 
Areesha bilal tagged me,
and the tag was
i have to search my iPod, (in my case my private memory card), for my favorite songs starting from A to Z.
A         Airplanes B.O.B ft Hayley Williams, Already taken,
B         Beautiful  by Eminem
C         Cosmic love, Crush by David Archuleta
D         Down, Dynamite
E          Edge of Glory, e.t by katy perry
F          Fireworks, Friday by Rebecca, frozen by lady gaga
G         Grenade by bruno mars
H          How to love by Lil wayne
I           Iktara, 
J           Just the way u are by Bruno mars
K         Khanabadosh London dreams
L          Loose yourself, Look at me, Love story
M         Marry you by bruno mars
N          Not afraid by Eminem
O          On the floor, Oh my god by Usher
P           Price tag Jessie J, Pretty little liars theme song
Q           none
R           Rain over me Pitbull, Rapture by nadia ali
S           Schiller ft nadia ali, somebody is me, Something bout love
T           Tik tok, Tonight by Enrique 
U           U make me wanna
V           none  
W          wake me up inside, When i am gone, Wavin flag, we will rock you, we r the world
X           none
Y           Yeah 3x Chris brown
Z            Zoosk girl.

Atlast i did it.
So people, today due to too much homework, and no time, this is all i am posting,
hope i at least bought a smile to your faces, if not
what the hell i can do?
and there is one more thing, 

and this would be the:
and, i may not be commenting on your posts, 
am really sorry for that, cos i am out of time, but still i do my best to read and post comment on your posts,
if i haven't commented on any of your posts, i am really sorry people, u just don't know how busy i am these days,
and OWAIS i hate you. :@