i luv u, u love me, we r a happy family. :D

Wednesday, 28 December 2011

Butcher revives, Where the hell is this boredom, find it kill it :P

i am back :D
Well i don't know at which time of the day u all would be reading my blog post,
so as to wish u all:

These whole two months time, 
and time is dark 
and dark is black 
black is U.S's president
and black is my Miss universe,

Did u see this year's miss universe,
geezzzzzzz, she is from Angola,
make her stand in front of a black screen 
and puff*
she would vanish :P
yah i am a racist, 
u have got a problem with that,
flush it dude,
u can be patriotic and i can't be a racist?
fuck it.............. 
Yeah there is no sense in what i just wrote but try to read from BENEATH the lines,
LOL!!! its ATEEQ's work, u won't still find a thing :P
nothing can get more awkward than this image. UGLYY:P

See i am a huge racist, 
u are not permitted in my dojo
.....................................................................And The SATAN walks into the bar :P
One more thing i am not ONLY a racist,
i am even a magniloquence. 
either u'll google this word, or u'll skip it with an intention that in further lines u'll locate its meaning,
cos, my english is great boss :P
see i told ya i boast a lot :P
arrogant he banda  :P
before u leave my page and fuck me,
i should.........................................CHANGE THE TOPIC. :P
So, there are now two months and few more days in my blogoversary  and still i haven't completed 100 followers,
do u have a tissue paper,
give me a box.
the world's not gonna end in 2012
cos my half yearly examination result is pending
the world's not gonna end in 2012
cos there's still lot to be on landing
the world's not gonna end in 2012
cos we all are still at peace
the world's not gonna end in 2012
cos the world is still in one piece
the world's not gonna end in 2012
cos i am single
the world's not gonna end in 2012
cos i am about to mingle
the worlds not gonna end in 2012
cos i don't give a fuck about that shit,
common do u think the world is gonna end in 2012 then text your reviews
@ ur best friends no,
then he/she will think u r stupid and
.....................................................................I AM BADSHAH :P
happiness on getting u f****d

  and just think on 2nd January, Monday, a kid goes to school without completing his homework,
the teacher asks why hasn't he completed it,
the boy looks up at the teacher and says softly:
...................................................I thought we were gonna die :P.......................................
ah, that would be all
wait wait wait wait,
this is good one,
Pathan was reading financial times. headlines read:
"Microsoft buys skype for 8.5 billion".
Pathan shouts:
...........................................oh teri kher, he should have downloaded it,
Fuck the world pathan, just fuck it,
no u can't.
cos Zardari is fucking it currently. :P
and lastly, a small test to determine how many smart asses are following me.

choose any alphabet from the ^above and i will tell u how smart u are. :P
like my post if u are smart :P
Take care people,
and think positive :D
<3 u all

Thursday, 3 November 2011

Just FTW, but from where i would get enough balls

Sometimes, there are way too many huddles to jump,
sometimes there are too many reasons to cry,
Sometimes life just don't moves the way u want it to move and u end up taking the wrong train and getting stuck in the middle of nowhere,
that is when, life sits in the audience and laughs on your flop act, and all u think of giving life is:

If u still need a word then its:

Well, Bullshit is not what i wanna discuss but the starting was quite admirable with those lines so, One need to do that in order to get applause.
What i wanted to connect with BULLSHIT are:
Those all so same Happy Endings,
Those all so same stories
and all that illogical magical bond of love,
Illogical, that's something which can also be connected with an OWL,
just think,
There is bird with two huge milf's boob size's eyes, and what this bird does is it keep those eyes open at night and closed in the morning,
just FTW and then rule over it,
oh, that was indeed an abusive statement, sorry, :P
Yeah so where was I,
Love stories,

or Bullshit,
That's same.

In every story, there is a girl, who is really beautiful but life is not good to her and she fantasize that one day she would be the princess and her prince would come riding on the horse and would rescue her,
and then they would get married and live a blissful life,
Happy ending,
and then music and the cast and u close the t.v and think that was a sweet movie which brought tears to your eyes, blah blah blah, and then u think of yourself as that girl,
Yeah i lost you somewhere, :P
no? then FTW and grow up :P
Just think reality,
yesterday i was in the footwear shop, and for almost half an hour i was confused with all those shoes and then when finally when i decided the shoes, I couldn't get my size in the chosen shoe,
Man that's a huge mouth, i wonder if he gives blowjobs  to elephants :P
and that was when it clicked me that WHY, it was only Cinderella's foot that fitted the shoe When it was tested on every girl's foot in that village,
and there i was sitting in that shop pondering into my deep thoughts,
don't you dare think that deep, even fishes sink die of drowning,
fishes die of drowning :P
That's some good sense of humor,
ateeq *holds his collar in pride :P
and Good sense of humor se yad aya,
( I think you can now easily translate this line :P)

so,  the question is:
Q) How many accountants would it take to change a light bulb?
ANS) Smile if you thought there was an answer to it,
Q) how many actors would it take to change a light bulb?
ANS) Only one, they are not made to share the spotlight :P
In case you r not laughing at my joke, laugh on this :D
Yeah, so where was I,
I was nowhere,
really i am not making any sense,
that's what i do,
Make no sense :P
and yeah,
I am really far away from blogging,
it's just i don't have time + any new ideas + my laptop is not feeling well and i just can't get into the mood,
I will be back soon,
and to my new followers,
GUYS!!!!! link me to your blog please, so that i could follow u back,
and am so sorry that i am not reading your posts, i am being a bad boy but soon i will be back,
This 10th grade is really a challenging one,
everyday there is a new competition, a new challenge, a new tournament that i need to win,
then i have my studies,
Gosh i am way behind in studies,
i feel the words dancing over my head, books seem filled with some crazy stuff,
maths and Add.Maths are the only subjects which seem awesome these days,
Mom's angry with my everyday indulgence in extracurricular activities and she keeps  reminding me of my studies, that's one hell scary life,
Ah scary se yad aya,
The news i read recently,
and this news is

A California woman has been arrested after authorities said she cut off her husband's penis with a kitchen knife and ground it up in a garbage disposal.
Catherine Kieu, 48, is accused of tying her sleeping husband to a bed with nylon ropes, pulling down his pants and slicing off his penis.The Garden Grove woman then took the severed penis into the kitchen, threw it into the garbage disposal and turned it on, mutilating the organ.

Should i give u a free advice,
Wear underwear with a digital lock with a password to unlock and lock it
No standing aviation, i know i am smart. :P
So this lady, the horrible women really surprised the shit out of me and now
I won't maaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyyyyy,
for my Phallus's sake:P
Ah, these times are indeed horrible.
So what's more,
there is nothing more and i should really say BYE to u all,
and  finally :
i HOPE U ALL are having awesome lives :D

Saturday, 8 October 2011

Just see, who the hell is here :P

U would see this on your blog list and two possible reactions:
u would

scream frenziedly,
so hard that ur lungs would blow out of your nose, and then they would hang there, 
one on each,
and the like children swallow there mucus into there pharynx u would swallow your lungs back,
after that u would scream again, this time a bit carefully and would say:
"Yeah the Boredom Butcher is back, OMG OMG OMG, 
Finally, there would be something good to read."
In case if the reader is a guy, he would rip his shirt apart and then run all over the city like a mad dog and then die panting,
yeah, i am evil for guys, mwahahahhaha

 wait, wait wait,
EVIL FOR GUYS se yad aya:
EVIL FOR GUYS, gonna tell u a joke here,
 (goron tum log sudhar jao warna ham tum mein itney ched kareinge itney ched kareinge k tum confuse hojao gey k sans kaha se lein or padein kahan se)
its not meant to be translated, so here is the joke:
A lion was chasing a rabbit in the forest, suddenly a fairy appeared and stopped them both,
the fairy said  "u both have three wises to ask me for, and i am gonna fulfill them".
the lion asked to turn all the male lions of this jungle to male
the rabbit asked for a helmet
then, the lion again asked to turn all the male lions of the world into females
the rabbit asked for a bike
in his last wish lion asked that he should be the only male lion of the world,
the rabbit asked fairy to make lion gay.
yikes, his nose is just like a phallus after workin out :P
sorry for that lame caption,
So where the hell was I,
yeah, the second reaction:
cos i really don't make sense :P
so u don't care.

Ah, how clairvoyance of me
Yeah it does seems as if i have returned from death,
imagine a guy who spends all his time on internet, the international sign and the patron of globalization,
the guy whose day starts with switching his laptop on and the day ends when finally the laptop says
"fuck off u moron".
and then a day comes when he is to switch everything off, shut his life down for three whole weeks,
ahhhhhhh, even the thought of it gives me adrenaline rushes.
But indeed i spent three weeks without fb, without blogger, without youtube and even without my cell phone,
yea, a pity it was baldy aunt

and now i ram finally back
hell yeah,
Exams are over but still the aroma of tension is all around me, yeah result is still there to come and i have gotta news tat would blow your head off, that would leave u shocked and the news is:
'i got 20 out of 50 in English exam that means that i failed to pass in it'.
and u know that when i heard the news i prayed for an earthquake, not a devastating one, i am not anti-human, but for a personal one that would just engulf me 
and would hurt no one, that would only kill me but then i controlled my emotions and suggested my inner voice to calm down, cos no need to visit hell so soon.
And don't u dare tell me that i am not going to hell, i am going there and u r coming with me, :P
u had a expression like this don't you
Amazing, ain't I,
wait, wait, wait,
Amazing se yad aya,
a new version of The poem Jack and Jill, the nursery rhyme i learnt when i was a kid,
Wow i was a kid once,
so the poem is:
'Jack and Jill, went up the hill
to fetch a pail of water
god knows well what they did there 
they came down with a daughter. 
U won't have had laughed so much on this, 
cos i didn't either
but who knows if u r nuts.
ah, i feel good, relaxed,
Wait wait wait,
relaxed se yad aya:
Starving and 
starving could be turned into a hilarious joke, if u would read the following with brain,
NOTE: not brains :P
Now i laughed really hard on this one.
ahh, my life, is not a good example for youngsters, 
Plz if you are 16 avoid being here and if u r female,  just avoid it seriously, i don't want girls all over me. :P
I just can't live without these small small exaggerations.
Ahh, the sad part,
its the end now,
i just wat to keep on writing but, then i have to keep something for the nest time,
and i am so sorry i didn't read ur posts in these three weeks but i promise i am gonna read all of yours new posts in few days,
Areesha and Ovais i just can't thank you enough for so awesome awards, they really mean a huge thing for me.
and before going, i have a small tribute for Mr.Steve Jobs, i don't really need to introduce a guy who made billions with an apple only and one stupid guy who knew how to make people empty their pockets,
here it is:
High five to the one who gets to see the real tribute in this image.
Bye everyone, 
Take care, 
i love you all for not leaving me and my stupid page it really means a lot to me.

Sunday, 18 September 2011


Before Hamza bin laden, breaks into my house and kills me,
I know i kinda freaked u out, since last night,
and u know what?
I was just playing with ur emotions,
and it was:
YEAH!!1 Just for the sake of sun :P
I know, next time we meet, u r gonna kick my balls hard, and then rip me apart,
and i won't complain about it,
cos i know i got u into a real trouble,
yeah, am so sorry, i won't do that again,
well, i would do that again, it was fun :P
So fun se yad aya:
Yeah bloggers meetup. 
You just can't imagine how much fun we had,
yeah, seriously u can't,
cos for that u should become
and in 
Moonie's style, 
Yeah, (nod ur head twice, if u wanna be assum)
Did, u read the title of this post?
yeah, we r DOUGHNUT HEROES, why?
WELL, its a long story, 
but the conclusion is cos we r awesome, that is why we r heroes
there is only one difference between us and them, they rescue people AND we get people into danger. :D

our, League of doughnut heroes.
and why that doughnut comes in the middle,
It's cos we all had a doughnut before the party began, 
and Asif, jaldi se doughnut khao, 
its like our energy pack.
Man!!!!! assum, aren't we. :P
and u know what,
I was out of my home since, 7:00 am in the morning and got back at around 10:30 pm,
and it took me almost 2 hours to get back to home, because of :
  1. Traffic on the roads of kaachi
  2. and, i live outside the city, Gulshan-e-maymar.
and when i got home and asked my mom for the food, she was like:
U were out the whole day, and at 11 pm u return and then ask me for food!!!!!

and u know the worst thing, i wasted almost 1000 bucks in a day, 
and still mouses were playing football in my stomach, (hunger)
Hey, what bakwas (crap) is am taking about,
Hey, did i introduce u the members of my team,
so here is my team:
Furee kat 

Hamza bin laden 
Russian bear 
Asif Iqbal 
of course:
ME. :D

and do u know what song like fits our  meetup?
i know it is annoying, but i love it,
Wait wait wait,
Annoying se yad aya:
Public toilets,
and u know what?
today i went into a public toilet in a mall,
ad there it was written:
"yahan akey to sab ki nikal jati he":P
translation for gori chamri:
"even macho man ends up peeing here". 
i was like,
WTF, and i laughed real hard on that one,
people thought i was crazy,
i would accept that,
cos the odor there makes u CARAZY,
that is so yukkkyyyy,
and u know what i do, i hide my face till my nose in my shirt,
That makes me feel better,
and what is more,
on one public toilet in Sindbad (an amusement park) it was written:
"This way to the ministry of magic".

Lol, i get easily distracted, so i was takin about meetup,
Yeah it was great,
i am so happy that i really went there,
the best part,
we sat in a resturant for almost 45 minutes and yet we were too busy talking that we didn't order anything,
than not to leave an impact, that we were some perverts we had a drink/ice cream before we left,
And one more thing,
I was like posting a description of every one below the pictures, but 
as it is like impossible for us to store the whole oceans of world into tiny bucket it is impossible to describe these extraordinary people in few words, lines or sentences,
They like are in comparable, and indescribable 
ahh, that was so great meeting them,
Wait, wait wait. :P
Great se yad aya:
women driving.
The only reason why u should look in both ways while crossing a one way road. 

i don't know who the hell gave these women  permission to drive,
when women drive, it is a fact that u would:
Jao gay car mein, or aao gay akhbar mein,
go in a car and return in newspaper
and the fact is, 
all the women of the world drive car in the same way,
back stiffed, eyes on the bonnet rather than on the road,
moreover, rather than using their side mirrors and rear mirror, they turn 360 degrees while turning or parking,
and when something happens to car, they won't dare to call someone or even mechanic, they would lock the car, hire a taxi and return home,
like my mom once did,
that's how it ends,

Monday, 12 September 2011

Blah Blah Blah. (part 5)

 DO U know what is the cause of variation in love between a husband and women,
The number of children they destroy together.
Man, u get things more clearly than those clean jokes. :P
Yeah so people,
on the floor, come and get some more,
yeah i have lost my brain,
NOTE: brain, yah the one in my skull,
not BRAINS. :P
till now i dodn't knew i have a brain,
hahahahah, but i knew i had brains,
i use them more than my brain,
OK, now my lame thing starts,
and ends,
and i push it in a KHADDA,
and then i slipped and into the khadda, and and and
woke up from sleep,
see, i told ya, i have lost something i never had (brain)

SO what happened?
the common question,
ya i am smart,
SMART se yad aya:
(from smart i remembered)
Have u ever thought, that would have happened if calculators were built with an ability to calculate smartness?
Yeah that would have been awesome for you,
no not for me,
COS, it would have shown the  "limit reached" sign, for my smartness.
ssssssss, ARROGANT. :D 

MAN!!!! back to the story of what happened,
yeah, today morning, i was like in the bathroom, washing my face, yah i do watch this ugly pumpkin daily,
and its like my hobby to wash my face with eyes open and i as usual applied the soap to my face, and started rubbing it,
NOTE: today is monday, and as usual on monday mornings i am in illusions, delusions and dilemmas,
So my mind was somewhere i don't know and i was rubbing my cheeks, all of a sudden the soap went into my both eyes,a nd i was like
I turned around don't know why, and as my luck hates me,
i banged my head into edge of the door, which was half open,
and i fell on the ground, hitting my hip and now i am
HIP-less too.
and it was so bad, i just can't tell you,
my ass hurts every time i sit.
spanked, :(
and have u heard this quote:
"a bad start makes the whole day a bad one".
No, u haven't
me neither,
but if you do hear it,
well u won't cos its not correct even, cos my day was good today,
cos i figured out, even i had a brain.
 the result of not paying for things, muftey mein itna hi milta he :P
OH man!!!!
OMG, i fogot but how,
lol, glad i remembered it at the right time,
this is what happened with my friend few days back when he was in a restaurant:
He said,
"I was sitting on my chair, enjoying my meal, suddenly i felt fart coming in, it was so urgent that i didn't had time to stand and go to washroom,
i had an idea, the music was loud, and every one was busy with their meal,
i timed my fart with the beats of the music,
when i was done, i looked around as a victorious guy but instead everyone was staring at me,
i was like What happened,
this was when i remembered that i had earphones plugged in my ear,
Hahahahhahahaha, horrible but funny,  

hahaha, that was epic wasn't it,
and the truth here,
did u laugh on it,
Now don't smile and think that u acted smart to laugh on it,
and u know what,
the person facing diarrhea can't laugh out loud or sneeze,
cus if he would put exert pressure, he would dirty his pants. :P
Hope u weren't facing diarrhea while reading this,
i don't want u to curse me, while washing your pants :P
Man, that would be enough for today,
i just had great time writing this one,
and hey hey hey hey
so what's the next plan for blogger meet-up,
Barish ne is waley plan pe toh pani pheir dia,
kisi k pas koi plan, mail me up, i wanna badly meet u people.
and one more things,
1 more week and then EXAMS,
and u know what
its the first time in my life, that i am waiting badly for exams:
no,!!! its just i am studying these days, yeah :D

Ok, before my mom gets into the room and throws my laptop in the dustbin,
Good bye folks,
hope u had a fun read,
and if not,
Lol u r fucked,
that woyld be the:
its not near, it is THE END.